14 Tips for #girldads
In honor of my 14th Father’s Day, here are 14 tips for #girldads:
From day one, take photos of her. And videos. As many as possible. If you have to, get a phone with a better camera and more memory.
Teach her practical skills like how to wash a car, how to use Excel, how to negotiate, etc. Algebra and spelling are important, but these skills are critical.
As soon as she can write, buy her a daily journal. It takes years to finish, but will become your most prized possession.
Make sure she talks to you about boys and crushes, even if it makes you squirm. You want her to feel comfortable coming to you one day when there’s real relationship issues.
Write her a letter for each birthday. Recap the highlights of the last year and what you’re excited for in the next. It’s also a great opportunity to impart a lesson or share some feelings.
Try to reward good behavior at the same rate that you punish bad behavior. Incentives matter, and she’ll intuitively recognize when the balance is off.
Unless you are Winston Churchill or something, being her dad is your most important job. Treat it like your career and get better every day. Study, learn, practice.
Shower her with compliments and praise. There are no diminishing returns to saying “I love you.”
Instill in her the love of books. Read to her every night at bedtime and make regular trips to the library or bookstore.
Have impromptu one-on-one adventures. Go to the museum. Take a bike ride. Bring her to the office. Or just go grocery shopping. It doesn’t have to be fancy, just leave the rest of the family at home.
Learn to be a great listener. When she gets emotional, ask her if she has anything she wants to say. Let her speak the whole time; just nod your head and ask questions.
Get her into sports. Ideally team sports.
No matter how much she gets on your nerves, don’t yell and scream. If/when you do, apologize and explain that your outburst was not OK.
At some point in middle school, she will stop letting you come anywhere near her. No more hugging, no more snuggling, no more tickling. Still, don’t ever stop trying.
Devin Faddoul, CFP® is the founder of Adda Financial | Outsource your financial life. Focus on your real life.